特にoffpisteさんにウケるかな、と思いまして。
;;;
Pipe specification
1. All pipe is to be made of a long hole surrounded by metal or plastic centered around the hole.
2. All pipe is to be hollow throughout the entire length - do not use holes of different length to form the pipe.
3. The ID (Inside Diameter) of all pipe must not exceed the OD (Outside Diameter) - otherwise the hole will be on the outside.
4. All pipe is to be supplied with nothing in the hole, so that water, steam or other stuff can be put inside at a later date.
5. All pipe should be supplied without rust; this can be more readily applied at the job site. NOTE: Some vendors are now able to supply pre-rusted pipes. If available in your area, this product is recommended, as it will save a great deal of time at the job site.
6. All pipe over 500ft (150m) in length should have the words "LONG PIPE" clearly painted on each side and end, so that the contractor knows it’s a long pipe.
7. Pipe over 2 miles (3.2km) in length must also have the words "LONG PIPE" painted in the middle, so the contractor will not have to walk the entire length of the pipe to determine whether or not it is a long pipe or a short pipe.
8. All pipe over 6ft (1.83m) in diameter must have the words "LARGE PIPE" painted on it, so the contractor will not mistake it for small pipe.
9. Flanges must be used on all pipe. Flanges must have holes for bolts, quite separate from the big hole in the middle.
10. When ordering 90 or 30 degree elbows, be sure to specify left-hand or right-hand, otherwise you will end up going the wrong way.
11. Be sure to specify to your vendor whether you want level, uphill or downhill pipe. If you use downhill pipes for going uphill, the water will flow the wrong way.
12. All couplings should have either right-hand or left-hand threads, but do not mix the threads otherwise, as the coupling is being screwed on one pipe, it is being unscrewed from the other.
13. All pipes shorter than 1/8in (3mm) are very uneconomical in use, requiring many joints. They are generally known as washers.
14. Joints in pipes for piping water must be water-tight. Those in pipes for compressed air, however, need only be air-tight.
15. Lengths of pipes may be welded or soldered together. This method is not recommended for concrete or earthenware pipes.
16. Other commodities are often confused with pipes. These include: conduit, tube, tunnel and drain. Use only genuine pipes.
;;;
Pipe specification
1. All pipe is to be made of a long hole surrounded by metal or plastic centered around the hole.
2. All pipe is to be hollow throughout the entire length - do not use holes of different length to form the pipe.
3. The ID (Inside Diameter) of all pipe must not exceed the OD (Outside Diameter) - otherwise the hole will be on the outside.
4. All pipe is to be supplied with nothing in the hole, so that water, steam or other stuff can be put inside at a later date.
5. All pipe should be supplied without rust; this can be more readily applied at the job site. NOTE: Some vendors are now able to supply pre-rusted pipes. If available in your area, this product is recommended, as it will save a great deal of time at the job site.
6. All pipe over 500ft (150m) in length should have the words "LONG PIPE" clearly painted on each side and end, so that the contractor knows it’s a long pipe.
7. Pipe over 2 miles (3.2km) in length must also have the words "LONG PIPE" painted in the middle, so the contractor will not have to walk the entire length of the pipe to determine whether or not it is a long pipe or a short pipe.
8. All pipe over 6ft (1.83m) in diameter must have the words "LARGE PIPE" painted on it, so the contractor will not mistake it for small pipe.
9. Flanges must be used on all pipe. Flanges must have holes for bolts, quite separate from the big hole in the middle.
10. When ordering 90 or 30 degree elbows, be sure to specify left-hand or right-hand, otherwise you will end up going the wrong way.
11. Be sure to specify to your vendor whether you want level, uphill or downhill pipe. If you use downhill pipes for going uphill, the water will flow the wrong way.
12. All couplings should have either right-hand or left-hand threads, but do not mix the threads otherwise, as the coupling is being screwed on one pipe, it is being unscrewed from the other.
13. All pipes shorter than 1/8in (3mm) are very uneconomical in use, requiring many joints. They are generally known as washers.
14. Joints in pipes for piping water must be water-tight. Those in pipes for compressed air, however, need only be air-tight.
15. Lengths of pipes may be welded or soldered together. This method is not recommended for concrete or earthenware pipes.
16. Other commodities are often confused with pipes. These include: conduit, tube, tunnel and drain. Use only genuine pipes.
コメント
大学の専攻は、全くこういうものとは違ったんですが、最近パイプについて少し勉強したんで。
今日午後、これを読んだ時、何か、テクニカルなことかしらって、？？マークが頭の中を駆け回りました。
でも、wittyなlimeiさんのことだから、絶対に、double meaningがあるはずだと思って、考え込んでしまいましたよ。Pipe specificationエトセトラとかけて、なんと解くの気分でした。（笑）
とてもclearでsimpleな文章なだけに、欲求不満はなおさら！
でも、ご専門のこと、jargonっぽいことみたいなので、普通のおばさんにはピンと来なくても無理のないものなようで、ほっとしました。
oh no! this is a JOKE!!!
専門外の人だと判りにくいけど、(だから面白いのだけど)
よく読めばナンセンスなんです。
わかりやすいのでいえば13番
「長さ3ミリメートル以下の配管は溶接が大量に必要なため経済的ではない。これは一般的にわっシャーと呼ばれる。」とか。
ワッシャーってボルトとナットの間に挟むドーナツ型の薄い金属なのはご存知ですよね。
それを配管と呼ぶところとか、薄さ3ミリのワッシャーを連ねて配管を作ろうと苦心する所を
想像するとニヤリとしてしまうんです。
それに配管が長いか確かめるために3.2キロも歩く作業員を想像すると可笑しくありません？
英国人の彼がどう反応するか興味しんしんだったので、見せたところ、
「This is nonsense. Who wrote this?」でした。笑ってなかった。
うん、やっぱり、この辺のことが専門の人じゃないと、面白がる前に、「このナンセンスは何の為？なにか裏があるの？」と？マークが浮かんじゃうのじゃないかな。うちの息子も、すごーくgeekyだけど、専門が違うから、きっと、おもしろさが分からないと思う。
それにしても、lemeiさん、これが面白いなんて、すごいですね！
ほんとにその世界に生きて、道を究めているんだなあと思いました♪
おおぅ。 私はこのスペックを読んで笑いが止まらなかったのに！
そして今読み返しても面白くてニヤニヤしてます。
Mも大笑いしていたので二人ともgeek認定ですね。笑。
業界ジョークで失礼しました。 それにしても面白い・・・。